My Personal Stats: Age: 24 Height: 6'2" Weight: 200 Hair Color: Brown Eye Color: Greenish-brown Favorite Food: Home made hamburgers! E-mail Address: JDBowhunt@Carolina.rr.com AIM Address: JMDetwiler83 |
Jonathan M. Detwiler's Place |
Thanks for checking out my site. These are pages that I created when I was 18 or so and haven't really kept up with recently. However, feel free to look arround. Maybe one day I'll update the site a little bit more. Jonathan In the meantime, I sometimes will post at www.xanga.com/jmdetwiler |
A February 2007 picture/(old Christmas picture) |
My Personal Stats: Age: 24 Height: 6'2" Weight: 200 Hair Color: Brown Eye Color: Greenish-brown Favorite Food: Home made hamburgers! E-mail Address: JDBowhunt@Carolina.rr.com AIM Address: JMDetwiler83 |
YOU KNOW YOU ARE A REDNECK WHEN AT YOUR CHURCH: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 1. The finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one. 2. People ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em. 3. The pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering," and five guys and two women stand up. 4. Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. 5. A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of." 6. The choir is known as the "OK Chorale." 7. Boone's Farm "Tickle Pink" is the favorite wine for communion. 8. In a congregation of 500 members, there are only seven last names in the church directory. 9. Baptism is referred to as "branding." 10. There is a special fund raiser for a new church septic tank. 11. Finding and returning lost sheep isn't just a parable. 12. High notes on the organ set the dogs on the floor to howling. 13. People think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy. 14. The baptismal font is a #2 galvanized washtub. 15. The choir robes were donated by (and embroidered with the logo from) Billy Bob's Barbecue. 16. The collection plates are really hub caps from a '56 Chevy |
Me on my 18th birthday/(rock climbing a couple years ago) |
Redneck Joke! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The latest ploy to drive the Taliban and Al Queda out of the mountains of Afghanistan is to send in a team of Alabama Special Forces. Billy Bob, Bubba, Boo, Scooter, and Cooter are being sent in with the following information about the Taliban: 1. There is no limit. 2. The season opened last weekend. 3. They taste just like chicken. 4. They don't like beer, pickup trucks, country music, or Jesus. 5. Some are queer. 6. They don't like barbeque. 7. They were responsible for Dale Earnhardt's death. Should be over in just about a week. Don't you think?!!!!! |
you might be an engineering major... * if you have no life - and you can PROVE it mathematically. * if you know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division. * if you've actually used every single function on your graphing calculator. * if it is sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you are working on a computer. * if you know how to integrate a chicken and can take the derivative of water. * if you think in "math." * if you have a pet named after a scientist. * if you laugh at jokes about mathematicians. * if the Humane society has you arrested because you actually performed the Schrodinger's Cat experiment. * if you can translate English into Binary. * if you can't remember what's behind the door in the science building which says "Exit." * If you are completely addicted to caffeine. * if you consider ANY non-science course "easy." * if when your professor asks you where your homework is, you claim to have accidentally determined its momentum so precisely, that according to Heisenberg it could be anywhere in the universe. * if the "fun" center of your brain has deteriorated from lack of use. * if you'll assume that a "horse" is a "sphere" in order to make the math easier. * if you understood more than five of these indicators. * if you make a hard copy of this list, and post it on your door. |